I’m in denial. My baby girl is now 6 months old (as of Monday). I think she must be in denial as well because we’re going on a week of being up 2-3 times at night, fussing during the day and general screamy-ness. I’ll take baby who used to sleep 10 hours straight for $1,000, Alex…
But that’s a story for another day.
How am I doing?
Overall, I’m feeling pretty awesome. Aside from the recent lack of sleep and constant lack of patience (I’m only human…) I feel good. When I think back to 6 months after Mr. O. was born, I was training hard for my second half marathon, putting in a lot of miles and at the time, thinking I was feeling pretty good. By comparison…well, there is no comparison from then to now. I was convinced that I needed to get back to running as soon as possible and really over extended myself. I’m proud of my accomplishment but I’m certainly not rushing to get back to that distance this time around. I’ve gradually been running more and more (with my first outdoor run FINALLY happening this past weekend!) and focusing on re-balancing my extremely unbalanced body and doing what I can to heal my core (I’ve been slacking on my Mutu exercises, I need to get back on that). I really want to focus on moving better, moving stronger and moving smarter. So far, I have no regrets about my approach other than wishing I’d done it sooner! I still have fatigue and I still have aches and pains but overall, I know I’m moving better and even though I’m not putting in miles upon miles, I feel so much stronger.
I would say that my biggest struggle is, and likely will continue to be my tummy. I’ve grown to embrace it for what it is-a reminder that I grew three (rather large) babies. I may have this pooch for the rest of my life but it’s not a reflection of me in any way. I do need to remind myself of this more often and stop looking at the pooch-less mom’s around me.
How is the Little Lady doing?
This little girl is growing like crazy! We started cereal with her a couple of weeks ago and after some initial disinterest, she’s a remorseless eating machine. We’ll be starting other foods with her soon. I love her enthusiasm for eating. She’s definitely her mother’s daughter
Breastfeeding is still going strong! Now that she’s teething (no teeth yet though), we’ve had some days that have been harder than others but she’s still interested and I’m more than ok with that.
Overall, I feel good. It’s only taken me 3 kids but I finally feel like a mom. I have a contentment about being at home that I didn’t have with my other two maternity leaves. I think a large part of that was that I was searching for my identity outside of being a mom and categorizing myself according to what I thought I should be to other people and not who I am in God’s eyes. I’ve been exploring that a lot over the last 6 or so months and I think the little revelations I’m getting are finally allowing me to see who I am and who I am becoming. It’s both exciting and scary! Being a mom is a large part of who I am but it’s not my entire story. I love being a mom to my kids and I love the identity that’s forming outside of motherhood.