How are you little Angel? I’ve missed you so. We didn’t get much time to get to know one another.
I still remember the first time I saw you. Your daddy let me go into the NICU with him. You were not even a day old. You were so small, but so beautiful. You looked so much like your daddy but there were traces of your mommy there too.
You were so small.
I wanted to hold you, kiss your little head and tell you how loved you were. But you were too small, not even 3 pounds. But I talked to you for a bit. Your daddy was so proud to have a son. His first born.
For the next 39 days you played such a big part in my life. I came to visit you as often as your mommy and daddy would let me. I watched you grow, I spoke to you often and I marvelled at your strength. Your little personality was unmistakable. You had fire, heart and determination.
But it wasn’t meant to be. You got sick. So sick. You fought so hard but your little body could only fight so long. My heart shattered the day your mommy and daddy called to tell me that there was nothing left that could be done. That it was time to say good-bye.
Exactly one year ago from this moment, I held you. For the first, last and only time. You were precious. So beautiful. I’ll never forget those special moments we had together. I wish I had longer with you. But I am so thankful for the time we had. I left you shortly after so that your mommy and daddy could spend the last moments of your life alone with you. They had so much to tell you. Shortly past midnight, you were called home to be with God and the other little lambs.
One year later, my heart is still so heavy. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to write this. It still hurts so much. Your parents were and continue to be, so strong and brave. They miss you so much. We all do. You’re still in my thoughts every day little one.
I miss you.
I love you.
I’ll always treasure our short time together.